


the silence in between

by Lise (thissugarcane)



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic (Video Game)
Genre: After Yavin, F/M, Pre-Ziost, mostly neutral sith, quick interlude
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:27:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26377267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thissugarcane/pseuds/Lise
Summary: When Nox had gotten a priority alert from Moff Pyron's personal security team about unauthorized access to shipping manifests, her first thought had definitely not been,oh, so a Republic spy thought borrowing my passcodes was a smart idea.
Relationships: Theron Shan/Female Sith Inquisitor, Theron Shan/Sith Inquisitor
Comments: 4
Kudos: 26





	the silence in between

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "No Light, No Light" by Florence + The Machine. No beta, so if you see any typos or such do let me know. It doesn't exactly have a happy ending, but then eventually, canonically they will! Also I don't believe it's 100% canon-compliant, but only because "Theron and the Inquisitor never met before Ziost".

When Nox had gotten a priority alert from Moff Pyron's personal security team about unauthorized access to shipping manifests, her first thought had definitely not been, _oh, so a Republic spy thought borrowing my passcodes was a smart idea_.

In Theron's defence, Nox mused, watching him on the security feed as two of Pyron's men asked Theron to accompany them, she hadn't noticed, and probably would have continued not to notice. So the theft, deception, borrowing, whatever one wanted to call it, of her clearances was possibly a low-risk venture.

What Theron was currently doing with said clearance was obviously a much riskier venture. This was a full lockdown shipyard. _Theron, what were you thinking_ , she thought to herself in despair. 

She saw Theron hesitate, knew he was going to do something much stupider, and decided this was the moment to butt in. "Agent, the sergeant is just trying to bring you to the ship for debrief," Nox drawled into the communicator. "Please don't keep me waiting."

She couldn't exactly say more, and she couldn't exactly say what she was thinking -- something along the lines of _please don't do anything which puts me in the position of having to kill you_ or perhaps _by the stars, Shan, don't fuck this up, I can't handle another disaster right now_.

To Theron's credit once more, his face barely flickered on hearing her voice, and her brief message seemed to hit the mark. Instead of whatever reckless move he had been intending to pull to free himself, he nodded, once, and followed Pyron's men.

Nox sighed. And to think, it had started out a relatively quiet day.

\--

"Thank you, sergeant," Nox said crisply, when they'd delivered Theron to the hanger where her ship sat. "You're dismissed."

Showing admirable survival instincts (or perhaps a lack of brains) (or perhaps both), the sergeants clicked their heels together, saluted, and about-faced without another word.

Theron, in contrast, crossed his arms and stared at Nox, wary.

She sighed, and turned around. "Come on, then," she called out, waving a hand and walking up her ship's ramp. "We can't exactly talk freely here."

She was immeasurably pleased, and then annoyed at being pleased, when he followed.

\--

Thankfully the only two aboard right now were Ashara -- meditating or researching quietly, Nox didn't care so long as the girl was content -- and Andronikos -- who was listening to synthpop and yelling at the protocol droid. Nox deposited Theron in her quarters as silently as she could and held a hand out, palm up: wait there. 

Striding back out to the common room, she snapped to Andronikos, "Out."

Nox didn't want Andronikos to see Theron; definitely didn't want that argument. The pirate scowled. "I just got settled. Was gonna do some maintenance on the nav computer, you know--"

"Out," Nox repeated. Andronikos went from looking annoyed to furious; she clicked her tongue. " _Please_ ," Nox tried.

He stood up, hands raised. "All right, all right. Everything okay, sith?"

"Yes, just-- I have something that needs doing," Nox said, feeling guilty for snapping (though the pirate could take it). It was no explanation at all but good enough, since Andronikos went -- to fleece Imperial NCOs at cards or drink in the shipyard's poorly maintained cantina, maybe. She didn't care.

Ashara appeared in the main room. "I've been wanting to get some time in the Imperial historical archives," she said quietly, and followed Andronikos off the ship. And that, Nox thought, was why Ashara was her favourite.

"Dedicated crew," Theron said when Nox re-entered her quarters, and it took Nox a moment to realize he was being sarcastic.

"They know my quirks," Nox said, forcing herself to relax. Theron looked well for a spy caught in an Imperial shipyard; and she thanked the stars she'd been close enough to come see what Pyron wanted in person. "And one of those quirks is a definite desire for privacy."

"Yeah, I guess interrogation can be hard with an audience," Theron quipped, looking annoyed. "Or is it just that you wanted me all alone?"

As much as she was loathe to admit it, Nox cheered up hearing Theron's particular brand of annoyed flirting. She never could tell if he was annoyed because he didn't want to be attracted to a Sith, or annoyed because of her, specifically. Damnit, she'd missed this Republic spy. Too much.

"You know that I'll take you alone whenever I can get you." 

That hadn't been what she'd intended to say. Nox told herself, _We don't exactly have time for this right now, no matter how much you want it._

Nox moved toward where Theron leaned against the bulkhead, not able to help herself. "However, in this particular case I thought privacy might be better because I have no idea what you're doing here or how loud I'm going to get when I find out."

It wasn't entirely true; she had a guess as to what Theron was digging for, since the shipping manifests he'd pulled were part of the resupply convoy to Lord Cytherat on the Makeb station. Still, there were any number of reasons why he might have been prying into The Makeb Fiasco, as Nox privately called it in her head.

Theron looked her up and down. "Maybe we could skip what I'm doing here and get straight to being loud for another reason?"

As answers went, that wasn't what she'd expected at all.

Nox laughed, threw her head back and let herself go. "I have missed you," she admitted. She put a hand on her hip. "What are you digging for, and am I going to have to pull Cytherat from where he's posted? I do like him enough to get him out of the line of fire. So to speak."

"Do you now."

Nox narrowed her eyes. "Are you--" but she cut herself off. Theron was far too accomplished a spy to allow her to see blatant jealousy unless he wanted her to; the question was, why? Never mind, this was actually an easy fix whatever the reason. "Cytherat is no more interested in me than I'm interested in going back to researching sithspawn."

Theron raised an eyebrow.

Nox rolled her eyes. "He prefers the company of men, Theron, and I like him because..."

Nox looked away, frowning. Theron, either sensing her hesitation or -- more likely -- seeing more in her face than she wanted to give away, said, voice softer, "Hey, you can like people, y'know. It's allowed."

If only he knew. She shook her head. "It's not in fact. But he believed in doing the right thing, in honour. It's extremely rare to find that in a sith. Well one still alive. Anyway, I like him for it. He's honest, too, which I value for the novelty."

Nox shook her head again. "None of which matters. Are you going to tell me what you're up to or not?"

"Is there an option where I don't?" Theron asked, voice cool again.

"Well," Nox retorted, "you did use passcodes given to my top agents, presumably stolen back on Yavin. More importantly you stepped on a Moff's toes in the process and got me in trouble. It would be polite."

"I could be working on your behalf," Theron shot back. "Against the Emperor. You never know."

"Are you?" Nox drawled, and threw herself on the bed when Theron just stared at her in answer. "We're getting nowhere," she muttered, "and this conversation is starting to bore me."

"Hey," Theron shot back -- but this time he was grinning. "I offered to skip this part and go straight to the fun stuff."

"Mmmm." Nox watched Theron as he came to stand beside her bed -- he was grinning a little still, eyes soft, and, and he looked _good_. She figured it was a diversionary tactic, she knew Theron was playing her, and that it was stupid to let him.

Still.

Nox wasn't known for necessarily doing the smart thing. "My mistake," she murmured, and pulled him down.

\--

"Well," Theron said -- he had one arm stretched out under his head and the other was stroking over Nox's bare shoulder. She had a feeling it was an absent gesture. "That was far more satisfying than the interrogation droids."

Nox chuckled. "I suppose there's still time."

"Pass, thanks," Theron said. His hand stilled. "As much as I don't want to ask, what now?"

Nox actually rolled her eyes, as she shuffled up; half-lying on Theron's chest, leg thrown over his, she actually felt somewhat relaxed for the first time in... days? Possibly weeks? "You know," she mused, "even with the irate Moff and the laughably dangerous security breach, I do think this is one of the best days I've had in quite a while."

"Wow. That's, uh."

"Oh calm down, Theron," Nox interrupted as he floundered. "It could have nothing to do with seeing you."

"But did it?" Theron asked.

Nox pushed up onto her elbows, looking at Theron who stared at the ceiling. She thought about the rest of the day. "I did have a decent breakfast," Nox said. "But mostly you."

Before he could start stumbling his words any further, Nox sat up. The sheets fell off her, and Theron's hand too. She scrubbed her face. "All right," she said. "If you're going to use my passcodes, you'd best have the right protocols."

Theron raised both eyebrows. "So one hour in bed and you're willing to give an enemy agent access to what you're doing? Just, let it all go?"

Nox felt herself slump. Without looking at Theron, she said, tired, "You aren't going to tell me. At best you'll make up a good lie. So, fine. My choices are cut off your access and have you do something more reckless than try and infiltrate Pyron's shipyard, or make sure you don't get caught. What would you have me do?"

"Hey, I'll take it." She felt the bed shift, and then Theron put a hand on her shoulder. "Thanks."

"As thanks, I'll take any warning to save Cytharat," she muttered to her hands. Theron dropped his hand. "That's what I thought."

"You think I don't want to tell you? It's crazy but yeah, I sort of do. You think that's okay?"

"I think you have a hard line between Imperial and Republic, and no matter-- no. It doesn't matter." Nox reached for her clothes. Trying to smile, she told Theron, "It's fine. I doubt any of the projects in my sphere I actually care about would catch your attention, you can wreak havoc on the military end as much as you like. I'll send you the protocols for not getting caught, though I'd take it as a personal favour if you kept a low profile. People might talk if I kept bailing out a particular agent."

"Kept bailing out, huh?" Theron asked. She kept fiddling with her clothes, reluctant to put them back on and admit: that was it, their hour was over, and Theron had to leave. He pressed a hand on her forearm. "Hey, look at me."

Reluctantly, Nox turned back around, robe half-on. "I would, you know," she admitted. "It would cause no end of trouble, but... I would."

After a moment, Theron told her, "I think that's the most honest thing you've ever said to me."

Inexplicably, that hurt, and Nox tensed around the sting. "I haven't lied to you. Believe it or not." She stood up, continued to dress with fumbling fingers. "I worked with you to end a threat, I answered your questions. I've been nothing but upfront. It's your fault if you can't believe--"

"All right," Theron interrupted softly. "You're right, I'm sorry. Obviously I'm not great at this. Especially since I don't even know what 'this' is. If you're interrogating an enemy agent on his intentions..."

Nox threw her hands up, exasperated, and finally gave into the urge to yell. "I don't actually care what you're doing!"

"Then why do you keep asking?"

"Because, Theron, I don't want it to blow up in my face later! Is that so evil? If you're looking into The Makeb Fiasco for shadowy intelligence reasons, I don't care! If the Republic intends to attack that sector of space I'd appreciate enough warning to evacuate a few of my own people since I value them! Is that so strange?"

When Theron said nothing, Nox decided a strategic retreat into the main room might be the better part of discretion. Although, she'd already yelled. Damn it.

Today had been going well. And then confusing, and then very well. Now, however -- she stole a glance behind her at Theron, Theron and his insufferably unreadable mask -- now wasn't going quite so well.

\--

To keep herself mostly calm-- well, all right, a little bit calm. Calmer than yelling in his face, anyway-- she went into the main room and threw herself onto one of the benches.

 _Now you've done it,_ Nox thought sourly. _Well played, lethal member of the Dark Council, brought low by an attractive man who looks at you._

Nox scowled at nothing in particular. It wasn't really fair to think like that: Theron was an accomplished spy, she was at best a front-line infiltrator but most often a blunt instrument, a battering ram. That he could get under her skin... Well. Some things don't change.

And yet. While they'd put away the mission, the hour they'd spent in bed, he'd been... Soft. Quiet. He'd looked at-- he'd _seen_ her.

Nox scrubbed her eyes. Damn it. She'd missed him more than she'd thought. Missed being on his side.

 _Damn it_.

Theron emerged after another moment and came to sit beside her. Without conscious approval her body leaned against his, and he nudged her shoulder with his own. "Okay, so. Here's the thing," he started. "I don't actually know if you should get your friend out of there. That isn't part of what I--"

He cut himself off before revealing any details, and Nox exhaled. "I'll recall him," she said. "He deserves better anyway."

"If he's so honourable, he'd be happy to serve," Theron countered.

Nox felt a smile ghost on her lips. "He is. So it's up to me to try and get him something better."

Theron shifted, where he sat, and then carefully put his hand around her shoulder. "I guess I missed you too," he murmured. "I didn't want to."

Nox huffed out a dark laugh. "You think I'm happy about how much I missed you? Theron, I'm absolutely stuck in every way. I wish I wasn't, but I am."

He nodded, after a moment. "I guess I don't get it," he said. "What you're dealing with I mean."

"If I could order the Dark Council about and get myself declared Empress to just make the idiots stop and _think_ for five minutes--" She cut herself off, imagining for a second the fantasy of putting herself on the throne. Holding everyone in the Empire accountable. Fixing some of the stupidest things. No one to ever tell her what to do.

Theron tilted his head onto her shoulder, a soft move that felt ridiculous given the circumstances -- and Nox let the fantasy fall. "I'd last less than a year," she muttered, because it was true. "Someone would kill me, and that would be that. I can't believe I'm still alive now."

"Are things that bad?"

Nox smirked. "Hoping a new Council seat will open up?"

Theron didn't answer, but he did sit up, pull away from her to stare angrily. Nox dropped her eyes to her lap. "That's unfair," he snapped.

"I know," Nox replied quietly. "It's not your fault I am... Everything I am. I suppose it's just that no one else cares." She shrugged, picking at a thread on her robe. 

"Look at me," she said darkly, shaking her head. "A sith lord unburdening herself to the Republic spy who looks at her nicely, showing all her weaknesses. I can't believe you haven't just assassinated me and gotten it over with."

She meant it to hurt, to be cutting, but when she dared glance at him, the fury on Theron's face was replaced by something a lot more complicated. "You think I'd kill you?"

"You would," Nox told him, swallowed around the lump in her throat the idea caused. "I don't blame you. Your mission is to protect the Republic, and it's somewhat admirable, even if it's also stupid and incomprehensible to me to feel that kind of loyalty to an ideal."

She stood up, not letting Theron say anything else -- what could he say? Nox was right, and the hurt of it was they both knew it. But the strangest part was, she really didn't blame him; she liked him too well.

"Come on," she said briskly, holding a hand out to him. "You have a shipyard to skulk around in, and I'm supposed to be overseeing operations on some moon."

Theron took her hand, but pulled himself into her space instead of anything else. He stared at her a long moment, before pressing his lips to hers gently, then, as Nox opened to his kiss, he wrapped his arms around her.

Nox, when he pulled away, found both her hands on his face, and saw they were trembling.

Damn it all.

Theron said, voice low, "It was good to see you. It, yeah." He stepped away.

Nox raised a hand to touch her mouth, then felt foolish, and dropped it. Just as low, she asked him, "Do you have a solid exit strategy? Tell me you've got a solid exit, Theron."

He nodded. "Shuttle, clearance codes, backup, everything."

She nodded too, swallowed. "All right. Then you'd better go."

He started to move to the ship's ramp, then halted and said, "Wait. How -- if I wanted to contact you, or."

Nox shook her head. "Those stolen clearances would get a message to me, but you won't. You aren't going to betray the Republic for this."

His face fell, and he dropped his eyes to the floor. Quietly, Theron told her, "I hate that you're right about this."

Nox smiled for real. She offered, "It means something -- it means a great deal -- that you'd want to, though," and he let out a harsh breath, and didn't say anything else as he slipped away.


End file.
